Mia to Mom: "Mom, my butt (pointing to her butt cheeks) is full of poop!"
Mom: "No, they're not really full of poop."
Mia: "Well, what are they?"
Aidan: "THEY'RE MOUNTAINS OF SKIN, MIA!!!"
Mia: "Oh."
Mom: Oh, man.
Friday, July 24, 2009
Friday, July 10, 2009
Overheard...The Finer Points of Hand Farting
Mia: "Daddy, how do you make hand farts?"
Dad skillfully demonstrates the hand farting technique
Mia: "Why is it so hard?"
Dad: "I never said it would be easy!"
Aidan: "Yah, it takes PRACTICE, Mia!"
Dad skillfully demonstrates the hand farting technique
Mia: "Why is it so hard?"
Dad: "I never said it would be easy!"
Aidan: "Yah, it takes PRACTICE, Mia!"
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
The Wallace Invasion...
As many of my dear readers already know, Bob's brothers Mike and Steve, and their respective families came to Kansas for a quasi-Wallace reunion of sorts. Not a full blown reunion, obviously because the whole family couldn't come, but we haven't all gotten together in about three years, so it was a reunion for us. And with Mike and Heidi and their 4 kids moving to Okinawa, Japan in a few days, another get together won't be possible for another three. So, Mike and Heidi hit the road Griswold-style and arrived late on the 27th of June. Steve and Francine and their three kids flew in the next day.
Preparations at our house have been ongoing for weeks now...home improvement projects, negotiations to borrow air mattresses (6 in all), cleaning, shopping, etc. I realized that our supply of pillows and towels was woefully inadequate— I still have towels hanging in there from 1995 for heaven's sake! Thank goodness for $3 Walmart pillows and the commercial pack of white towels from Costco!
We painted, we de-cluttered, we cleaned our office! The visit was worth it just to get that pit of despair cleaned up. Blankets were hauled out of storage. I stocked up the bathrooms with toilet paper, wipes, toiletries. I hit Costco for snacks, milk and food for a couple of meals (I couldn't fit a week of food for 16 people in my fridge!) We were ready!
When Mike and Heidi arrived, we were hyped. The kids had been asking ALL DAY when they were arriving, what time it was, how much longer that would be, in hours AND minutes. I'm sure it was a very similar situation on the car ride out here. Once they arrived, the kids immediately warmed up to each other and they got themselves situated.
The next day we decided to take it easy...I know a 3 day car ride can wear you out and I think they were relieved to not have to do anything. Steve and Francine arrived with the girls Sunday afternoon, and the invasion was in full swing! The visit was seriously a blast, and we are so grateful that the two families made the effort to come visit little old us in little old Kansas. It was amazing to get to spend so much time with all our little nieces and nephews, to have the opportunity to get to know them individually. I loved learning about all their little quirks and idiosyncrasies. Thanks guys for a great time! We love you all and miss you so much.
I'll chronicle the week with individual posts...it's just easier that way. Let me just leave you with some stats. This last week we consumed:
10 gallons of apple juice
7 gallons of milk
3 gallons of orange juice
5 loaves of bread
countless hot dogs
5 boxes of mac 'n' cheese
8 pounds of blueberries
Almost an entire box of 81 count fruit snacks
3 boxes of capri suns
Preparations at our house have been ongoing for weeks now...home improvement projects, negotiations to borrow air mattresses (6 in all), cleaning, shopping, etc. I realized that our supply of pillows and towels was woefully inadequate— I still have towels hanging in there from 1995 for heaven's sake! Thank goodness for $3 Walmart pillows and the commercial pack of white towels from Costco!
We painted, we de-cluttered, we cleaned our office! The visit was worth it just to get that pit of despair cleaned up. Blankets were hauled out of storage. I stocked up the bathrooms with toilet paper, wipes, toiletries. I hit Costco for snacks, milk and food for a couple of meals (I couldn't fit a week of food for 16 people in my fridge!) We were ready!
When Mike and Heidi arrived, we were hyped. The kids had been asking ALL DAY when they were arriving, what time it was, how much longer that would be, in hours AND minutes. I'm sure it was a very similar situation on the car ride out here. Once they arrived, the kids immediately warmed up to each other and they got themselves situated.
The next day we decided to take it easy...I know a 3 day car ride can wear you out and I think they were relieved to not have to do anything. Steve and Francine arrived with the girls Sunday afternoon, and the invasion was in full swing! The visit was seriously a blast, and we are so grateful that the two families made the effort to come visit little old us in little old Kansas. It was amazing to get to spend so much time with all our little nieces and nephews, to have the opportunity to get to know them individually. I loved learning about all their little quirks and idiosyncrasies. Thanks guys for a great time! We love you all and miss you so much.
I'll chronicle the week with individual posts...it's just easier that way. Let me just leave you with some stats. This last week we consumed:
10 gallons of apple juice
7 gallons of milk
3 gallons of orange juice
5 loaves of bread
countless hot dogs
5 boxes of mac 'n' cheese
8 pounds of blueberries
Almost an entire box of 81 count fruit snacks
3 boxes of capri suns
Sunday, July 5, 2009
For the next Wallace Invasion...
It was this crazy all week...*Aidan and Kyle have to match. Always.
*A 10 year old girl named Merci is the only one who can control 9 younger cousins age 9 to 2.
*Mike & Heidi's kids need only a 30 minute power nap to sustain themselves into the wee hours of the night.
*When in doubt, tattle.
*Who needs water parks when you have a slip 'n' slide and a half deflated kiddie pool?
*As it turns out, Wallace brotherly bonding occurs best when Lucky Charms and X-Box 360s are involved.
*In reference to said Wallace brothers, whoever came up with that genetic personality trait business was totally on to something.
*According to Kyle, worms taste like cotton candy.
*Never exit the Great Mall parking lot after fireworks on the west side.
*When attempting to feed 10 kids 10 and under for any length of time, hire a personal cook.
*Floors get really sticky after a week of feeding said cousins.
*No matter how environmentally friendly you are, buy paper plates.
*Francine can transform ordinary canned roast beef into the most heavenly delicious tacos you'll ever taste, in this life or the next.
*It is a scientifically proven fact that it is an impossibility to get 16 people out of the house before 11am. I dare anyone to try it.
*Blueberry picking is at its best before 11am.
More to come...
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